catchn up

I been away for so long. Time just been flyin. Since my last blog, Me and wife to be, took my daughter to Disney World for her bday. We had a blast. As we watchd the disney parade, my daughters reaction brought a tear to my eye. It feels good to show my daughter the good things of life. My team (Dallas Cowboys) have been playing horribly they lost 4 of teir last 6 games. Damn shame. Romo is injured and they're playing shitty. Hopefully we make it to the wildcard playoffs. Most importantly, history was made. We have a Black president. I feel good to be part of history. The papers went like like crazy. My lady works at USA Today, and she barely was able to get a paper, luckily her airhead friend didnt know the significance of what happened and gave her, her paper. Anyway life is good, Im still in love and the days to the wedding is getting shorter

A better life awaits

Woke up bright and early for 2nd day of class. 5 boring days of sitting in class, listen to a person educate me on being a good ramp agent. From 2 days of class I gathered that i'll be overworked and underpaid, and also that if I make a mistake my life or 50+ passengers lives can depend on it (LITERALLY). Life is full of changes. I remember just yesterday when i was a Security Guard, now im in the process of being a Ramp Agent. Is that really what I really want. I mean who wouldnt want the opportunity to travel for free, or at 95% discounted fee? France. Europe. Brazil. Costa Rica. Africa. Sweden. Las Vegas. Cali. Florida. I mean the places are endless. To travel the world is a big dream of mine and wife to be. This job would make that dream a reality. As much as im siked about the free travel, its many negatives that strips away the joy of traveling for free. Im tired of being broke an unemployed, I feel like this job is a desperation move. Im so grateful to have a strong woman by my side who's keeping me grounded, but sometimes I get slightly depressed that I cant treat Wife to be. Take her to dinner. To the movies. Buy her them things that i know she will look sexy in. Growing up I had aspirations of being a lawyer. Even though i was excited of just the thought of being a lawyer, I was just to immature and misguided to realize, I was the only obstacle in those aspirations. Since then I been so lost, not knowing what i really wanted in a career. One thing that I was sure of, I wanted to live comfortably, and be able to provide for my family. Not to long ago I came across a site about becoming a plumber. Reading the site interested me about the opportunity, but the future earnings interested me more. The more I think about being accepted into the program and having a career in plumbing, I become more excited about the opportunity and less excited about the money. I havent felt this way since I was in school and wanted to be a Lawyer. Now im a mature man and know if I want this I have to go after it. Im excited about having an acquired skill. Im excited about taking this skill and being my own boss. Im exciting using this skill to earn extra cash in my spare time. Im excited about using this skill to make home improvements without having to pay another man. Im excited about being a real estate investor and being able to fix up, my own investment. Im excited about bartering my skill for another persons skill, such as an electrician. Yes im excited about being able to live life comfortably. October 7, I plan to apply and take the test to get accepted in Plumbing apprenticeship program. If I dont get accepted, what steps can I do to chase this opportunity? I dont need to be a ramp agent to travel. We just will have to finance our vacations. If we can afford it, then why not. Ramp Agent or not, our traveling dreams will be fulfilled. So am I wasting my time going through ramp agent training when i honestly dont want to be a ramp agent. As the instructor speaks, and my future co-workers, sit enthusiastically, and talk about how they cant wait to start and someday become lead ramp agents, I ask myself why am i here? Is money that much of a necessity that im willing to take any job thats offered to me? To me. I guess it is. Tomorrow is day 3, being in a place i know I dont belong. Today the instructor went around class and told people individually, what he think would be their best contribution as a ramp agent. He skipped me and 3 other people. Is it because i'm sending off signals that says I dont belong, or this isnt the job for me. Or is it because he think im not capable of being a good ramp agent. Nah it cant be that, every job I had, I was one of the best. If I actually give my all I wont be one of the best, I will be THE BEST. Today as i was web browsing, something inside said go to church. I know I need to go. I know I need to pray. I know I need to believe. I know I need to have faith. I know something better awaits. Its time for change. Where do I start?
Its time to go for what I want and not for whats giving to me.

short on energy

Finally went to sleep at 4am, and I'm up at 6am. First day of training... So tired I honestly dont know how i made it through 8hrs of sitting at desk in a classroom setting. Dont know how but I made it home safely, Good thing for autopilot. I got my nap in, So im up and ready to root for them Boys in blue. My girl is an Eagle fan so shes on my bad side, until the night is over with... unless my team lose... then i'll give it a week. My girl (BTW her name is Joyce) been endorsing google reader for so long, and now she got me hooked. So im getting my worldly news as i count down for kickoff. Well whats a football game without fattening snacks, Im headed out to get some grub for my private football party.

Some People never change

Today started out great, a beautiful day, and i was able to relax in the bed with my fiance until she went off to work. My daughter woke me up early to fix her some cereal. As i turned on some cartoons to keep my daughter entertained, I was disturbed by the sight of my fiance's cat vomit on the carpet. If there is 1 thing i hate its vomit. So im up early in the morning scrubbing vomit off the floor. Finally done... back to bed next to my lady. Time passes take lady to work. Get home and turn on the game, Redskins vs Saints. We having problems with cable so I couldnt enjoy game. Anyway Redskins won. Time now a little after 4, about time for me to take daughter home. Call my irresponsible baby mom. Same Story different day she stuck somewhere and cant find a ride home. I hear the same excuse every freaking Sunday. Anyway I try not to overreact I still have until 10 before I pick my fiance up from work. tick tock tick tock 4 turns to 5, 5 turns to 6. Its now 10pm. I call baby moms, to hear same bs excuse. Shes waiting on her ride. So i get my lady and drive to my moms house, to shorten the drive to my baby moms house. 1100 Im still hearing the same excuse. I mean its Sunday night, why arent you home getting your kids fed and stuff together for school and daycare. Some people dont understand the meaning of priorities. What can I say my mom warned me. Im trying to stay calm, but i cant say about my fiance. She's trying hard to stay out of it. I know 1 day she gonna get fed up and speak her mind. In the end, y daughter gets drop off at 1 in the morning. We pull to the house she outside conversing with her "friends" while her child and some other kid is playing outside, like its a sunny saturday evening. WTF!!!!!!!! What parent have their child playing outside so late in the morning. I really think its time for me to takemy child away from her, im afraid if dont she will ruin my childs future. When me and my fiance first started dating, she said something to me that played apart in me choosing her to be my future wife. Would i want my daughter to be like her mother? Hell MF'N NO!!!!!!! My mom warned me, I shouldve listened. Now i have to deal with this sorry excuse for a mother for another decade or so. WHAT AM I TO DO????? I home at 2 in the morning. Time is lost. QT with my lady is lost.